Celebrating with linen

I began this blog exactly 4 years ago with this post.

Last year I provided some stats about the blog. Here are the updated numbers for the blog:

Total number of posts: 628

Total number of posts written by guests: 14

Total number of site visits: 7,270 (definitely more than half of them are mine!)

Total number of photos used: 318

Personal photos where someone’s face can be seen: 32

I have not been writing this blog for me, but rather for you.  As time has gone by I have tried to be more personal in my writings, opening windows into how I think.  It has been a fun process and one that I intend to continue for years to come.

I am not an accomplished writer, nor am I an experienced blogger.  One of my inspirations has been Amit Verma's India Uncut. Recently, on the anniversary of his blog, Amit provided some tips for bloggers. Here are the tips in condensed form:

• KEEP IT CRISP
• DON’T SHOW OFF
• ASK YOURSELF WHY YOU ARE WRITING YOUR BLOG
• WHO ARE YOU WRITING FOR?
• ADD A LITTLE OF YOURSELF TO THE POST
• BE REGULAR—BUT DON’T FORCE YOURSELF
• DON’T BE SCARED TO TRY NEW THINGS
• USE PROPER ENGLISH
• USE LINKS
• DON’T TREAT THE READER LIKE A FOOL
• NEVER GET PERSONAL
• DON’T BETRAY CONFIDENCES
• DON’T CLUTTER YOUR PAGE
• USE PICTURES
• DO IT ONLY IF IT’S FUN

Those were the days..

"You see the whole country of the system is juxtapositioned by the hemoglobin in the atmosphere because you are a sophisticated rhetoretician intoxicated by the exuberance of your own verbosity."

TMC: Episode 11 - Icing on the cake

Welcome to The Midwest Chronicles (TMC). These are the accounts of the exploits of the Nebraska Cricket Club in the 2009 season. To spice up what would otherwise be a routine match report of runs scored, wickets taken, and catches snaffled (or spilled) these posts are being written with a tongue firmly in cheek but with the facts completely in the true. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the meandering show.

Here's a complete guide to the cast of characters and their nicknames. The cast will be updated as players are added or dropped or nicknames changed as the season progresses.

Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.
Navjot Singh Sidhu

It is an uncommon man that does not flinch at the altar of success.
Richard Fortwin (JQ to some)

The Cedar Rapids All-Stars and NCC traveled across the great state of Iowa to Ames for the final game of the regular season. A lot of things rode on this game. For NCC, a win would ensure that they led the regular season standings for the second year in a row and a home semifinal in Nebraska. A loss could put them in the prickly position of having to travel to Iowa for a semi-final outing, pending some other results. For CRA, a loss would not be earth-shattering as they still had another game to go but a win could propel them into the top three and help them not have to travel all the way to Omaha for the semi-finals.

Are you still with me after all that? Well, permutations and combinations mean nothing once the games are played. Here is the report.

CRC's captain Senthil won the toss and elected to chase. Captain Ozone sent in Thin Man to provide some thrust and, in a move from left field, sent in Johnny Walker with him. Johnny had never previously batted higher than #9 in any game but has the unique distinction of being the only left-hander in the squad.

Thin Man began with a trademark six over long-on but even in the short time he was at the crease he looked a little out of sorts. Not surprisingly, he out soon after playing well over a simple, straight delivery by Abdul. 11 runs in 8 balls with 1 six pretty much tells the story there.

Bean Counter and Walker set about accumulating runs with some very brisk running between the wickets. Neither of them is a threat to pepper the boundary, least of all when the grass is tall enough to cover people's ankles. In spite of that, Counter did manage a brilliant hook shot for four when Aamir pitched it short. But that was to be the only shot hit in rage for a while. The duo put up a decent partnership, but not at any great rate, and eventually Counter perished to a weak shot to the gully fielder. His contribution was 17 runs in 35 balls.

Bhishma, making a return to the ground where he sealed a win over ISU, did not last for long, adjudged LBW to Abdul while attempting a flick/pull/sweep shot that is unique to him. Following him soon after was Walker, out for 16 runs (23 balls) when he hit a flat shot straight to the mid-wicket fielder who caught it more out of self-preservation than anything else. Until then Walker looked unhurried and *gasp* elegant in the way he dealt with all the bowlers. There is some batting potential in the guy after all.

Kingsize Dada and Energizer Bunny staged a mini-partnership where they tried to steady the boat that had been rocked by the previous batsmen's mistakes more than anything else. At this point, Senthil and Mamu began bowling in tandem. This requires a separate paragraph of its own.

Mamu (no one seems to know his real name) is a bowler who was probably the rage a hundred years ago. He walks up to the wicket and let's the ball go with exaggerated flight. His ball does not spin after it lands but it always lands in a good length spot, teasing the batsman into stepping out of the crease. The ball takes a good 2-3 seconds to reach the batsman and is just the first step in the trap. He always bowls with a packed leg-side field with at least 2-3 fielders on the boundary waiting for that lofted hit. But the real danger is lurking much closer. Should the batsman step out of the crease and miss the ball, he may as well keep walking. Behind the stumps lies the biggest danger - Mike Strydom. This South African, big and strong as you might imagine, is also the best wicket-keeper in the league and possesses the fastest reflexes of any keeper most of us have seen in person. The square-leg umpire gets a lot of workout when Mike is standing up to the stumps.

Senthil, on the other hand, is that rare delight - a leg-spinner with control. In the opinion of most folks in the league, he is the best spinner around and teams are content to play out his assorted mixture of leg-spinners, top-spinners, googlies, and the faster one. This day, Senthil had another added incentive - he needed two wickets to achieve a personal milestone of 100 wickets in the league. By the time he was done bowling he had not only accomplished that goal, he blew past by a pair.

Kingsize Dada and Bunny removed any risky shots from their arsenal, but the battle of patience was won by Senthil. With just a ball to go for the drinks break, Kingsize could not resist trying to hit a googly to the vacant deep square-leg region. Unfortunately he forgot one vital component - connecting with the ball. LBW and victim number 99 was in the books.

After the drinks break Doctor Kamikaze played an innings that is entirely his domain - full of thumping heaves and airy swishes. You can accuse the man of anything but you can never accuse him of not swinging out of his skin every time he wants to hit. Unfortunately for him, on this day, he mainly made contact with the air around him. 11 airy-fairy runs later he walked back, another victim of the Mamu slow-death.

Captain Ozone and Bunny then showed the rest how to play the spinners, repeatedly advancing down the wicket to smother the spin and steal at least a run every ball. Soon, unable to stem the flow and frustrated about not being able to make further inroads, Senthil took himself out of the attack. Mamu went through his overs without further damage....or so it seemed until his last over where, as a final act, he got Ozone to reach for the ball and spoon an easy catch to cover (12 runs in 15 balls).

Seeing the procession of batsmen retiring to the pavilion, Bunny turned on the after-burners and began to hit out. When he plays without thinking, Bunny is devastatingly good. On this day, he eschewed the predetermined nonsense that plagues him and displayed his vast skills. Twice he stepped down the wicket and slammed Mamu and Senthil over long-on for a six. When Senthil left, and Mike and Singh tried their hand, he waited for the ball and creamed boundaries to cover and midwicket.

Running out of ideas to stop Bunny, Senthil came back. Bunny misjudged the bounce and spin of a googly and was out LBW for 49 (3 fours, 2 sixes, 35 balls) giving Senthil his 100th wicket. What a worthy opponent he had snared, making the memory even more...err...memorable for him.

After than the innings folded very quickly. U-Turn remained not out on 0, Gunmaster G9 gave Senthil his 101st wicket and not to be left behind, Little Boy got bowled swinging across the line to become victim #102.

NCC had scored just 149 runs in 29.3 overs. Definitely about 100 less they wanted to before the game started based upon the outstanding batting line-up they had. Mamu's analyses were: 6-0-26-3, while Senthil had even more outstanding numbers: 4.5-1-23-4. Not to be forgotten in this is Abdul's initial burst that slowed the run-rate: 6-1-18-3.

As always, here comes the much-awaited section of the TMC match reports. Let's now take a break to appreciate some of the less known things about the world around us.

• The pig is the only animal besides a human that can get a sunburn.

• You can boil water in a paper bag over an open flame.

• An average American spends 6 months of his life waiting at red lights.

• If you toss a penny 10000 times, it will not be heads 5000 times, but more like 4950. The heads picture weighs more, so it ends up on the bottom.

• The average ear of corn has eight-hundred kernels arranged in sixteen rows.

• A housefly's tastebuds are in its feet.

• Shrimp can only swim backwards.

There is only one way to defend a small total - bowl the opposition out. Ozone opened the bowling with Gunmaster and Bunny. While Bunny settled into a beautiful rhythm, bowling out-swingers and in-swingers seemingly at will, Gunmaster appeared more labored in his run-up. Sure enough, four overs into his spell, Gunmaster pulled up lame with a side strain that required immediate rest. The CRA batsmen - Mamu and Alok looked to consolidate before opening out. However, a piece of brilliant fielding undid their plans. In taking a sharp run, Mamu-Alok underestimated Thin Man's throwing arm. A "tracer bullet" from Thin Man found the stumps and Mamu's inning ended even before he started.

Abdul has never impressed me as a batsman who can do more than just block the ball. His 14 ball innings did nothing to dispel that notion and he was out to a sharp catch by Bunny off Bhishma's accurate medium-paced top spinners (there really is no other way to describe what he bowls). Bhsihma took over from Gunmaster and tightened the screws in an outstanding spell of controlled bowling.

Mike Strydom patted away the good balls and swatted the erring ones with ferocious power. With Alok stroking it smoothly through the off-side and Mike looking ominous, frowns started creasing some of the NCC foreheads. Bunny finished his spell with a flurry of runs showing signs of losing control once the ball lost its shine. He still ended up with fine numbers for the day: 6-0-21-1.

Kamikaze and Bhishma gave little away and forced the batsmen in taking more risks than they really wanted to with the small score they had to chase. Mike Strydom tried one shot too many and was out LBW to Kamikaze and the first nail in the CRA coffin had been struck.

Aamer and Murtaza then decided to throw caution to the winds and swung high and mightily at everything sent their way and began to take the game away once again. Three sixes, one four, and numerous half-chances later, Bhishma forced his way back into the game castling Aamer in his final over to revive NCC's hopes (32 runs in 28 balls, 1 four, 2 sixes).

U-Turn got into the act with his bowling getting Senthil to loft it towards Walker at deep mid-off. Back-peddling for dear life Walker pulled off a stunning overhead catch to herald the start of a great finish for NCC. That was the invitation Kamikaze needed to put his stamp on the game. Bowling his stump-to-stump line he invited batsmen to swing across the line and pay the price for it. Two fellows hit it high up towards deep midwicket where U-Turn took two nerveless catches and in between those catches a third guy lost his stumps.

Kamikaze finished with 5-0-23-3 while Bhishma had an outstanding game - 6-1-12-2. CRA was all out for 119.

With that NCC was assured of topping the regular season table and went into the semi-finals in a good mood. The opponents? The 4th ranked team in the league...the very same Cedar Rapids Allstars!

Would it be third time lucky for CRA or would NCC continue to dominate the Iowans this year. Time (and my next match report) will tell.

Speed thrills

As documented elsewhere, we all know who the fastest human in the world is. But even Usain Bolt's exploits pale in significance to the speed attained by the fastest animal in the world - the endangered cheetah.

Sarah, an 8-year-old Cincinnati Zoo cheetah, succeeded Wednesday in setting the world speed record for land mammals. Sarah covered 100 meters in 6.13 seconds at the zoo’s Regional Cheetah Breeding Facility, also known as the Mast Farm, in Clermont County. It was her second run of the day. In her first try, she ran 100 meters in 6.16 seconds. The record had been 6.19 seconds.

(...) In comparison, humans are a rather plodding species, at least when it comes to sprints. Jamaica’s Usain Bolt holds the 100-meter record with a time of 9.58 seconds, which he set last month at the world championships.

Visually numbered

If you are a mathematician, how do you view some of the recent blockbusters of our time? Here's a window into one such mind:

In the final scenes of “The Dark Knight” (spoiler alert!), the Joker gives the following choice to the passengers of two ferries: they can either blow up the other boat and save themselves, or themselves be blown up. If no one decides within a certain amount of time, both ferries are destroyed.

(...) This seminal problem in game theory has an important property: while cooperation is a more socially beneficial strategy, it is actually a more “stable” strategy for each person to betray the other, since this makes each better off independent of the whims of his friend. This behavior is known as a Nash equilibrium and is named after John Nash, well-known from the more obviously mathematical film, “A Beautiful Mind.”

US Open leftovers

Here are some final thoughts from the 2009 US Open.

1) One of India's greatest sportsmen added to his collection of trophies at the US Open, while missing out on the the mixed double's crown where his team was the #1 seed.

Check out the following link for the brief video of the Leander Paes-Lukas Dlouhy win over the Mahesh Bhupathi-Mark Knowles combination.

2) If your name (Roger) sounds like Rajah, is it surprising that when you visit NY for the US Open you live in digs fit for a king?

3) The best thing that has happened for tennis in the last few years has been the emergence of Rafael Nadal as a challenger to Roger's era of domination. A case could even be easily made that Nadal is the superior player among the two of them, lacking just a few Grand Slams on hard courts to enter the GOAT equation. Greg Garber of ESPN expands on this theme alluding obliquely to the predator-prey aspect of the relationship shared by these two rivals who, surprisingly, are good friends off the court.

4) Finally, I end with the shot that Roger Federer himself acknowledged as the greatest shot he has ever hit. Too bad that was the high point of the weekend for him, though in all fairness Juan Martin Del Potro won the Open, taking it away from Federer with a coming-out party for the ages.

The weight of our lives

The preview of George Clooney's latest movie is something else altogether. Listen to the character tell us about all the baggage we carry around with us. I could listen to this preview over and over and then once again for emphasis.

Stranger than fiction

From CricInfo's Ask Steven column comes this gem of a question:

When was the last time that a country fielded a Test team, all 11 of whom had scored a first-class century? asked Dennis Clarke from Southampton

The answer: The last time this happened was in the first Test between Australia and Zimbabwe in Perth in 2003-04, the match in which Matthew Hayden broke the world record with an innings of 380 in Australia's total of 735 for 6 declared.

So far, so predictable... except it was the Zimbabwe side that contained 11 players with at least one first-class century to their names (Ray Price, their No. 11, had made his in a Logan Cup match in Zimbabwe the previous month).

I haven't stopped smiling every time I think of this. It is just the type of question that I love to answer on quiz shows.

Cricket clicks

Two stories for your consumption:

1) First the ridiculous. Gautam Gambhir is injured and will not participate in an ODI series. Naturally, the BCCI selectors pick Virat Kohli as his replacement, a player who himself is just coming back from a shoulder injury. Is it me or does it seem odd that when an injured Delhi batsmen cannot make it, he is replaced by a recently-injured Delhi batsman. Got to maintain those zonal quotas, don't we?

2) And now for the sublime. Aakash Chopra continues his quest to demystify some of the behind-the-scenes aspects of international cricket on CricInfo. This week's article is about team meetings and their relevance to player preparation for matches. Fascinating and insightful. Read it and enjoy.

And like that, poof. He's gone.

The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
- Verbal Kint while talking about Keyser Soze,
The Usual Suspects

It is a common theme in movies for people to "disappear". Due to fortuitous circumstances they are able to leave their current life behind and set up shop elsewhere. Since movies require drama, these subterfuges are rarely permanent. Eventually, the past comes back to claim the protagonist.

Some say that art imitates life. Others insist it is the other way. After reading this story, I am not sure which is true. But I do know one thing, all the people who got caught are the failures. The real successes are folks who got away with it and we do not know how they managed it. Still, it makes for a fascinating human story.

The urge to disappear, to shed one’s identity and reemerge in another, surely must be as old as human society. It’s a fantasy that can flicker tantalizingly on the horizon at moments of crisis or grow into a persistent daydream that accompanies life’s daily burdens. A fight with your spouse leaves you momentarily despondent, perhaps, or a longtime relationship feels dead on its feet. Your mortgage payment becomes suddenly unmanageable, or a pile of debts gradually rises above your head. Maybe you simply awaken one day unable to shake your disappointment over a choice you could have made or a better life you might have had. And then the thought occurs to you: What if I could drop everything, abandon my life’s baggage, and start over as someone else?

Ray of hope

In the 1980's Bombay Dyeing relied on two folks to push their products - Karan Kapoor and Lisa Ray. Karan Kapoor had a brief stint as an actor and faded away. Lisa Ray seemed to be going down the same path until she came roaring back in the late 90's and has been a regular in movies since then.

Like many other actors, Lisa Ray maintains a blog. Unlike most other actors, however, she is very articulate and provides personal details. (Even Amitabh Bachchan who blogs about almost anything related to him rarely provides personal details.) A few days ago, Lisa shared something of an intensely personal nature. It takes great courage to tell people the news she shared and, more impressively, it takes greater courage to be able to deal with it the way she has been.

I hope she beats it and has a long and prosperous future ahead of her.

RIP: Amy S.

Like most people, I have a pattern to my 'Net surfing. For quite some time, one of my regular stops was to a blog maintained by an Australian cricket fan. I enjoyed reading her diatribes and discussions on the more irreverential aspects of the game. And then, a few months ago, she stopped blogging. Breaks in blogging are not uncommon (look at how often I tend to disappear from here) but it got a bit too long.

Yesterday, I found out why, and it made me very sad. Amy S died in a car accident a few weeks ago. It is strange that a person who I never knew personally and who did not even know I existed (as I never left a comment on her blog) could have had such an impact on me.

Rest in Peace, Amy. I am one of many folks who will miss you.

Damage control

Last year Novak Djokovic's image at the US Open took a beating with Andy Roddick, in particular, getting on his case. The fans got into it, too, during the tournament and a visibly annoyed Novak lost his cool. Since then he has been trying to make amends.

On Monday night, after easily beating Radek Stepanek, he went some ways towards building bridges by doing impersonations. Unlike last time when he picked on his contemporaries much to their dislike, this time he chose to imitate John McEnroe. What followed did more for his cause than anything else he could have done. Well watch and find out what hapened:

Musings from the Open

I wrote a long diary that detailed my trip to NY/NJ for the US Open tennis tournament. But reading it was boring - there's only so many names I could drop and matches I could mention before it became repetitive, even to myself. So I am changing the format and putting down some random thoughts that flitted through my (over-crowded) cranium while I was at the Billie Jean King United States Tennis Association National Tennis Center (honestly, yes, that's its full name).

1) I think it was the late David Foster Wallace who once likened watching Roger Federer play to a "religious experience". For three years I planned my schedule such that I would watch Roger play, but was flummoxed every time. This time, due to a very generous gift, I had tickets to every session from Friday through Monday night. I got to watch Federer play twice, once against Hewitt and then against Robredo. I did not find religion, but I was definitely in awe. People talk about his court acumen and flair, but an underrated part of his game is his speed and stamina. He was not required to display the latter but the speed was there for all to see. He is deceptively quick around the court and dictated the pace of most of the points he played. I anticipate that he will win it all this year.

2) I watched Federer, Nadal, Murray, Roddick, Venus, Safina, Dementieva, Oudin, Sharapova, Paes, Bhupathi, and a whole slew (yikes, there I go name-dropping again) of players in all sorts of courts big and small, but came away with one overall impression. Very little separates the good from the great. The cream of the cream play in the majors and almost everyone is capable of hitting winners from all over the court. The very top players (top 5 on both sides) have a couple of extra gears that they can seemingly transition to when in trouble but it is just a small difference. The BIG difference is that the top players, especially the really elite ones, are able to maintain this high level for extended periods of time. In the case of folks like Nadal and Federer, the later it is in the match, the more pronounced this difference becomes as the opponents begin to make mistakes while these guys sustain their high level.

3) Many trees have been killed to write about Melanie Oudin and her feats as she sliced through the Russians one after the other. Except for Sharapova, all the other Russians that she faced imploded under pressure. This applies to Dinara Safina and Vera Zvonareva, too, who lost to other players. All these women have big games based on hard-hit groundstrokes, powerful first serves, and immensely impressive court coverage. But in return for that they have the worst mental attitude of all. As soon as things start going against them, they start doubting themselves. Melanie played well, no doubt about that, but she was helped by the rapidly disintegrating opponents too. If I was their coach, I'd tell them that they had to go through an entire match without throwing a tantrum when they missed a shot. It takes most of the fun away from a closely-fought game to see a player give up halfway through the deciding set.

4) Rafael Nadal uses every inch of the space available behind him on the court. Not that he will have to worry about it any more for the rest of his career, but I do not think he would be able to play his normal game at some of the other courts because there simply isn't enough room for him to stay back and return the ball. The accompanying photo is of the Grandstand, the third biggest court at the complex and it would not be enough to contain Nadal, such is his range.

5) I watched a lot of Leander Paes (from close quarters in the Grandstand) and saw him interact closely with Lukas Dlouhy and Kara Black. As I write this, he has made it to the finals in both the men's doubles and the mixed doubles. Impressive for a guy who is 36 and has always relied more on his reflexes than anything else. He looks just as quick as always and proved that one great player on a doubles team can be enough to carry a decent player in his wake. It used to be said that in the 1980's the best doubles team in the world was John McEnroe and his partner or Martina Navratilova and her partner. I can see how that can be true! Paes is the livewire of the teams and the audience is there for him, and not just traveling Indians. I sat in a section with folks from all over the world and all of them had Paes in their sights the whole time. Not bad at all.

6) (Storm in a teacup alert). The ballkids at these tournaments are now also required to fetch towels for the players in between every point. It is a little annoying, really, to see that. When things are not going well, the players tend to be very rude, throwing the towel to the court or behind them, expecting these kids to clean up after them. Andy Roddick was positively rude to the ballkids during the first couple of sets of his match with John Isner. Later on he got better but it irked me to see that. And Roddick is one of the nice guys on the tour (as far as I have seen on television and other times that I have "interacted" with him in person). I hope the kids are rewarded in some way for putting up with this treatment.

7) I have said this in the past, but it bears repeating - the US Open is the most fan-friendly sporting event that I have been to. There is a great deal of commericalism and intense price-gouging (a bottle of water costs $4, for instance) but that is the case everywhere. Getting to the facility is very easily done (subway or LIRR) and, once there, the visitor has first-come-first-serve access to all the courts, except for the big one (Arthur Ashe). And if you cannot make it to Arthur Ashe, there are numerous big screens around the complex where you can follow the action. Players sign autographs and pose for pictures, if asked, and celebrity-sighting is a common experience.

8) I have long been a regular reader of L. Jon Wertheim, who writes for Sports Illustrated. After the Federer-Nadal Wimbledon epic of 2008, Wertheim used that as a backdrop to write a book about the rivalry and the two players. Even reading about that match was too much for me so I resisted all impulses to buy it. After Federer's resurgence and subsequent overhauling of Pete Sampras' career mark, the pain had eased enough for me to contemplate buying it, but I hadn't yet. On Sunday, Wertheim was at the complex signing autographs and promoting his book. I caved in and bought the book (review to follow in a few days...but short note - it is really worth reading). When I walked up to him I asked him if he would write a personal note for me inside the book. He responded that he would, but it would depend upon what I wanted him to write. I told him what I wanted; he laughed at it and agreed to do so. So, I now have in my collection Strokes of Genius, by L. Jon Wertheim, with the words: Manish, Ivan Lendl was indeed the truth!

9) Growing up in the 1980's I was mesmerized not by the splendid artistry of McEnroe or the blazing aggression of Becker but by two contrasting characters - Stefan Edberg and Ivan Lendl (but not in that order). Lendl was, to me, the hard-working, under-appreciated toiler. A man who worked his way to the top and worked really hard to stay there. Tennis did not seem to come easily to him, especially the grasscourt kind, but he stayed at it till he became one of the best grasscourt players in the world (two Wimbledon finals do not come by accident in a time when McEnroe, Becker, and Edberg are at or near their peak). When Pat Cash came out of nowhere to upend him in the 1987 final, I cried for hours at the unfairness of it all. (After all these years, I still cannot think of Cash and not imagine cement-mixers and broken bones. Grrr).

After his tennis career wound down, Lendl disappeared from the public eye. He did a couple of stints of guest commentary on television but seemed more interested in his golf game. On Sunday, years after he had steadily wandered away from my tennis consciousness, I heard he was signing autographs at the Open! Tingling with anticipation, I stood in line and got to meet him, 20 years later than I wanted to but it was just as moving for me now as it would have been then. He has changed a lot (appearance-wise) but who cares. I got to shake Ivan Lendl's hand and get his autograph!!

Once I figured out that I could get autographs from the players, I decided that every year I would sacrifice a hat for players "special" to me. Last year it was Leander Paes. This year I went in deciding that only Federer, Nadal, or Agassi could grace my hat. But once I saw Lendl, it was a no contest. This would be the year of Ivan the Terrible!

10) Ivan Lendl is indeed the truth! Actually, what I really wanted to say was that I think it is cool that they play John Williams' Imperial March whenever Darth Federer comes on court for a night match wearing an all-black outfit.

Labor pleasure

Coming soon to this blog: How I spent the holiday weekend. Here's a sneak preview...

Rock on

Once in a while you come across a video that just makes you stop in your tracks and gape. This is one of them. I have camped on the edge of a glacier at 18,500 feet but what I remember most from that trip is the long trek to the glacier. It was the getting-there part that was more memorable than the being-there part...but for the wrong reasons: I was petrified of falling into the valley during the long trek along the edge of a cliff to get to the glacier.

So, for someone who cannot look down from the second floor of a building without feeling a little disoriented,this video showcases skills that are unfathomable. (Unfortunately, embedding has been disabled so you will have click on the link to see it on Youtube).

To mis-quote Denzel Washington: "Hanuman ain't got nothing on this!"

Lightning in a graph

Usain Bolt is impressive. I think I have mentioned it in the past. Here's more proof on how spectacular his achievements really are, graphically speaking.

That bit at the end? That's what Usain Bolt's doing to the record book. Here's the best way to put it into perspective: to go from 9.86 to 9.72 (Usain Bolt's first world record) took just under seventeen years. Taking roughly the same amount again off the record — 9.72 to 9.58 — has taken Usain Bolt fifteen months.

Here's his astonishing run at the 200m world record:

The faux ending

One of my favorite TV shows is Scrubs, a comedy set in a hospital, without the annoying canned laughter in the background. (Canned laughter bugs me...it is as if the writers are telling us when we are supposed to laugh).

Recently, the final season of Scrubs came to an end, sort of. The main character - JD - is leaving and the show is expected to continue in a slightly different format but will not be the same any more.

Captured here are the last few minutes of what (to me) is the real finale of the show. We are all allowed to dream a little, aren't we? I hope JD's dream comes true.

Catching on

My favorite cricketer-writer (here I go again!) Aakash Chopra, talks about fielding at forward short-leg, easily the most dangerous place in cricket for a fielder. Read the article in its entirety. Some nuggets are reproduced below.

A key difference between fielding at short leg and silly point is the way the fielder protects himself when the ball is hit. At short leg you must go down as much as possible and become as small as you can: batsmen rarely try to keep the ball down while pulling or sweeping.

At silly point the fielder must jump to defend, because batsmen rarely try to hit the ball in the air on the off side. They aim to keep the ball along the ground, and hence you can avoid the line of the ball by jumping. While jumping you must remember not to turn your back towards the batsman because all your protective gear (shin-pads, abdominal guard and helmet) are worn on the front. Keeping an eye on the ball helps too!

(...)

Is it scary?
The correct answer would be a firm "no", but the honest answer is "yes". I have been scared a few times. For example, while fielding at short leg when Matthew Hayden and Justin Langer were sweeping almost everything. The shots were so ferocious that the fielders at long leg - and this was at huge grounds like the MCG and SCG - were ducking for cover. A few yards left or right of them meant a boundary.

I got a real fright once when the ball hit my helmet on its way to crashing into the fence, bouncing only once in between.

(...)

The moment I decide to allow the ball to hit me, the brain processes that information and prepares the body. It might sound weird, but once you know it's going to hit you, it doesn't hurt all that much.

Beyond flash

Even as memories of his exploits on the field begin to diminish (in some sports fans minds), Andre Agassi's aura continues to increase due to all the charity work he does. It is no surprise that he will be honored at the opening ceremony of this year's US Open.

I like reading any news about a select few persons, and Agassi is high on that list. One of my life's biggest regrets is that he played his last match one round earlier than I had anticipated so I never got to see him play in person.

9.58 seconds

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the closest any human has ever come to flying without artificial aid. Simply mesmerizing.



I have no doubt that Usain Bolt can run a sub-9 second 100m race with a good tail wind (or maybe even without that).

Maggie noodle review: Love Aaj Kal

Love Aaj Kal is not a movie I would recommend heartily. There is a very good rom-com in there somewhere but the movie-makers have not found it. Instead they have taken the story, made it predictable, and then robbed it of all its charm.

Deepika Padukone smiles in almost every scene, even when her heart is being broken, while Saif Ali Khan, sadly, seems more interested in his own looks than the girl he is courting. His best work in the movie comes when he is playing a down-to-earth sardarji. Since he does not get a chance to show off his pectorals and biceps, he concentrates more on trying to act. Where's the Dil Chahta Hai-Omkara actor hiding?

There are two actresses who do steal the scene in the short time that they are on-screen. One of them plays a simple Punjabi girl and has just three lines of dialogue but you wouldn't know it from watching the movie. The amazing thing is that the actress who played the role is Brazilian!

The other actress is a surprise (click here if you really want to know) and she lights up the screen simply because one can't but help smile at all the implications of her on the screen (least of all that she is back on the screen after a loooong time).

The Good, the Fat, and the Ugly

Reason number 106453 to explain away why I don't go to the gym:

The conventional wisdom that exercise is essential for shedding pounds is actually fairly new. As recently as the 1960s, doctors routinely advised against rigorous exercise, particularly for older adults who could injure themselves. Today doctors encourage even their oldest patients to exercise, which is sound advice for many reasons: People who regularly exercise are at significantly lower risk for all manner of diseases — those of the heart in particular. They less often develop cancer, diabetes and many other illnesses. But the past few years of obesity research show that the role of exercise in weight loss has been wildly overstated.

"In general, for weight loss, exercise is pretty useless," says Eric Ravussin, chair in diabetes and metabolism at Louisiana State University and a prominent exercise researcher. Many recent studies have found that exercise isn't as important in helping people lose weight as you hear so regularly in gym advertisements or on shows like The Biggest Loser — or, for that matter, from magazines like this one.

The basic problem is that while it's true that exercise burns calories and that you must burn calories to lose weight, exercise has another effect: it can stimulate hunger. That causes us to eat more, which in turn can negate the weight-loss benefits we just accrued. Exercise, in other words, isn't necessarily helping us lose weight. It may even be making it harder.

He'll always have Green Bay

How many times can a man change his mind? If you are Brett Favre ... hmmm ... one loses count.

It is totally up to the fellow to decide whether he wants to play or not. It is not my business nor my place to tell folks when to hang up, but I wish the media would not fuel the fire everytime he has an urge to express himself.

Folks like Don Banks and Peter King need to just not report or dissect every little shrug of the shoulder and should leave the "legacy" part to history. If Brett Favre does not care about his legacy being tarnished, why should we. It's his legacy, his life, his fame, let him decide!

As far as my personal opinion is considered, Favre's best years were in the mid-to-late 90's. Since then he has been more about reputation and less about stellar play. I have seen him make too many mistakes to think of him as a dependable QB. Mistakes he got away with for being a "good bloke" would have cost less-heralded players their careers. Here's a good deconstruction of the myth of his prowess. (Surprisingly, it is by Sal Paolantonio).

The truth is, Favre did little over the past decade to earn the gushing praise heaped upon him by our fawning brethren in the media.

After beating the San Francisco 49ers in the 1997 NFC Championship Game, Favre won just three of his last 10 playoff games. Eli Manning had more postseason wins in a 29-day span this past season than Favre had in his last decade with the Green Bay Packers.

Yes, Favre won a Super Bowl -- 11 years ago! But as his career arc spiraled downward, the blind adulation only got worse.

Favre's passer rating in his last 12 postseason games was a pedestrian 77.8. In his last five wild-card games, he went 2-3 with more interceptions (nine) than touchdown passes (seven). In his last three divisional playoff games, he went 1-2 with seven TDs and seven interceptions. That's a 3-5 record with 14 touchdown passes and 16 picks.

In two of his last four postseason appearances, Favre threw two of the most unthinkable playoff interceptions in NFL history, both in overtime -- to Brian Dawkins of the Philadelphia Eagles in 2003 and to Corey Webster of the New York Giants in January. In fact, Favre is the only quarterback in NFL history to throw overtime interceptions in two playoff games. In his last nine playoff games, Favre threw 18 interceptions.

(...)

Indeed, a decade after his last moments of glory, the football hype machine continues to paint Favre as a hallowed icon of Americana, a symbol of all that is right with sports, a Wild West gun-slinging good ol' boy. There's Brett on the farm! There's Brett with his family! There's Brett on the cover of Sports Illustrated! There's Brett throwing another overtime interception!

Favre was among the best in the game, once upon a time. Those days are long gone. Only the idolatry remains..

In fact, this photograph is how I will always remember him, holding his head after another dumb interception. How apt.

TMC: Episode 10 - Heating up

Welcome to The Midwest Chronicles (TMC). These are the accounts of the exploits of the Nebraska Cricket Club in the 2009 season. To spice up what would otherwise be a routine match report of runs scored, wickets taken, and catches snaffled (or spilled) these posts are being written with a tongue firmly in cheek but with the facts completely in the true. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the meandering show.

Here's a complete guide to the cast of characters and their nicknames. The cast will be updated as players are added or dropped or nicknames changed as the season progresses.

The successful man will profit from his mistakes and try again in a different way.
- Dale Carnegie

Ah, but a man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a Heaven for?
- Robert Browning

With the regular season reaching winding down, 'tis the time for return engagements. This time it was NCC's turn to visit the Iowa Bulls. In the first game of the season Iowa had steamrolled to an embarrasingly easy victory.

For a change, Captain Ozone won the toss. The skies were clear, the temperature was hovering in the mid-80's (and would go on to cross 100 by mid-afternoon), the humidity was over 80% and Ozone had no hesitation is asking Iowa to put up a big total...errr...bat first.

Bhishma returned to the line-up along with Gunmaster G9. And for the first time this season Bean Counter (Nirmal Srinivasan) made an appearance. Counter is a long-time stalwart who has been missing in action this season as he writes his dissertation (PhD). The casualty of this influx of big guns was the 12th man, Bob Loblaw, who still managed to sneak a foot into this game...read on to find out how.

Gunmaster and Energizer opened the attack and were quite fast and swinging the ball well. But a couple of overs each was all they got as Damian, in a policy he adopted all day, shunted his bowlers around in 2 over spells (barring one bowler, Bhishma, who bowled 6 overs on the trot). Doctor Kamikaze was the first to draw blood, inducing the opener to chase a wide ball. The resulting top edge was comfortably pouched by Little Boy behind the stumps. Soon after the other opener made the mistake of testing Thin Man's throwing ability, perishing to a brilliant throw from deep fine-leg by the underrated fielder. The third wicket fell when the next batsman pushed Bhishma's first ball tamely to short mid-off where Johnnie Walker held a sharp chance.

But all of this was just the appetizer. The main guy - Utpal Patel - was now at the crease. UP and Mihir took their time settling down, eschewing any risks in an attempt to consolidate as there was a long way to go in the 30-over match. UP did provide one sharp chance to the right of the keeper but trudged on after that without a hint of a chance for a long time.

There is very little love lost between Mihir and the NCC folks and, to his credit, he ignored all the banter and kept UP company. At the 15 over mark, the Bulls were 70 for 3 and setting themselves up for a fine charge at the end. After the drinks break, UP opened up his shoulders and began to find the fence, or rather, the untenanted area beyond the fence. For a batsman who looks fantastic when he bats in straight lines, UP uses the clog over cow corner as his stress-reliever shot. This day, he relieved a lot of stress with that shot.

As the temperatures rose, Mihir and UP upped the scoring rate and the fielding came under fire. Singles were being converted to two's and catches began to go down. Ozone turned to his trusted middle-over enforcer U-Turn and the young man delivered first ball. UP slogged towards mid-wicket but instead found it heading towards long-on where Chikna Slater was stationed for just such a mis-hit. But the unthinkable happened and Chikna dropped the catch. To celebrate this reprieve, UP then launched the biggest six I have ever seen in person, way, way, way over midwicket, so much so that Kamikaze stationed at the boundary would have signaled a six if HE had been the umpire (rather than being on the fence). Energizer dryly remarked to the umpire, "This is not fair. The batsman should be made to go and fetch the ball for hitting it so far and wasting our time."

In the next over, however, UP tested Chikna's fielding ability and this time the fellow held onto the ball, thereby saving himself from a fate worse than death. Chikna still got his fair share of ribbing, and lest you think he was done, you don't know NCC that well. The next batsman, Anand, sat back deep in his crease, content to push away the full-pitched balls but relishing the chance to thwack the shorter and good length ones. Runs flowed like...well...runs and another drop by Chikna at long-on, an easier one than the catch he took did not help matters.

With the total piling up, Ozone turned to Johnnie Walker, and three successive batsmen tested U-Turns ability to take high catches at long-on. Ca-ching, Ca-ching, Ca-ching, and just like that three guys walked back to the pavilion. U-Turn, apart from currently being the highest wicket-taking bowler in the entire league may also be the leading catcher, and deservedly so on both counts.

Not to be left out, in the final over of the innings, Bob Loblaw (in the game as a substitute), took a high, swirling catch at long-off looking straight up into the sun. The last ball of the innings was, however, smashed to the straight boundary to take the Iowa Bulls score to 203 for 9. An indication of the slow outfield (long grass) and bad bowling is the fact that the Bulls innings contained 10 sixes and just 3 fours.

And now for what is fast turning into the most eagerly-awaited part of these reports - the mid-match compendium of head-shaking facts and tid-bits of information (the last one is especially for you, Ozone).

• Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave.

• The raised reflective dots in the middle of highways are called Botts dots.

• You're more likely to get stung by a bee on a windy day than in any other weather.

• Research indicates that mosquitoes are attracted to people who have recently eaten bananas.

• It's against the law to catch fish with your bare hands in Kansas.

• In Los Angeles, there are fewer people than there are automobiles.

• There are two credit cards for every person in the United States.

• If you toss a penny 10,000 times, it will not be heads 5000 times, but more like 4950. The heads picture weighs more, so it ends up on the bottom.

Continuing with his theme of using pinch hitters, Ozone sent in Little Boy. Unfortunately, this did not work out well and Little Boy perished, losing his stumps in an attempt to slog a straight ball. Iowa began with two left-armers, a rarity in this league, and kept the newly promoted Chikna and Bean Counter quiet. Chikna, reeling from a fallow run at the crease, and itching to make amends for the two dropped catches, settled down into classic Chinka-mode, punching the ball on the off-side and driving and flicking on the leg. Finally looking like the Chikna we all know, he set about preparing a platform of formidable proportions. Counter did what he does best, sliding along in Chikna's slipstream, rotating the strike and running like a hare. He did have one moment of awe-inducing brilliance. A short-pitched ball by James climbed onto Bean' shoulder, and a picture perfect hook shot sent the ball one bounce over long-leg. After that Counter settled back into his single-double mode. The duo made steady progress, frustrating every attempt to buy a wicket. After the pacers were done, Iowa resorted to spin and this was more useful. The scoring rate slowed just a little bit and that induced the mistake. Chikna looked to clear long-on but hit the ball with the bottom of the bat. The fielder at long-on was Mihir, by far the best fielder on the Bulls squad and he showed Chikna how these high catches should be taken. As is often the case, a double-breakthrough was effected as Counter perished in the very next over, having done his job of keeping the scoring rate at a manageable rate while ensuring there was no early collapse. Thin Man entered with the score at 72 for 3 in 15 overs (almost identical to the Bulls score at a similar stage in their innings). His first scoring shot was a square-cut for six over point and that signalled the start of the attack. Kamikaze joined him at the other end and the two of them systematically dismantled everything that was thrown at them. Kamikaze, in a departure from his normal mode, attacked all around the wicket, while Thin Man was content to test the square fielders on both sides of the wicket. A boundary an over was maintained for the next few overs and with 12 balls to go and 16 runs required, NCC was in the driver's seat as they had 6 wickets in hand (Thin Man got out after a 80-odd run partnership with Kamikaze). Some frenzied running off the first 4 balls brought it down to 10 in 7. Kamikaze then launched one high in the gap between long-off and long-on. UP, fielding at long-on came running across, and to the horror of his teammates, missed the ball which bounced off his head and beyond the fence for a 6 (here's exclusive video footage of the missed catch, taken by a hidden camera). Kamikaze then got out going for the winning hit but 4 runs in 6 balls is too easy a task with 5 wickets in hand and NCC won with 3 balls to spare. Bhishma remained not out on a brilliant 1 (off 1 ball), while Energizer was there with him to enjoy the moment. Kamikaze scored 60 in 30 balls and also took 3 wickets to receive the man of the match award. With this win NCC maintained its position at the top of the CLIA ladder with just two games to go.

TMC: Episode 9 - Batting practice

Welcome to The Midwest Chronicles (TMC). These are the accounts of the exploits of the Nebraska Cricket Club in the 2009 season. To spice up what would otherwise be a routine match report of runs scored, wickets taken, and catches snaffled (or spilled) these posts are being written with a tongue firmly in cheek but with the facts completely in the true. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the meandering show.

Here's a complete guide to the cast of characters and their nicknames. The cast will be updated as players are added or dropped or nicknames changed as the season progresses.

Not doing more than the average is what keeps the average down.
- William M. Winans

The price of excellence is discipline. The cost of mediocrity is disappointment.
- William Arthur Ward

After losing out on more than just a cricket game a few weeks ago, the Cedar Rapids Challengers welcomed NCC with revenge on their minds. The game was played at a neutral venue in Des Moines, at the home ground of the CLIA. Here's the report of the match (written in the style of a Peter Roebuck Tour Diary).

Nice day for cricket. Occasional clouds, bright sun, low 80's F. Bob Loblaw loses toss. Nothing new for NCC. Losing toss, that is. CRC bats first. 25 over match. Grass long and uncut for a week. "Outfield (not) lightning quick," quips Shastri (in our minds). Energizer Bunny and Chikna Slater bowl first for NCC. Openers tied down by Energizer. Outswinger working brilliantly. Play and miss. Play and miss. Repeat previous sentences. Repeat once more for emphasis. All off Energizer. Unbroken spell to start game. 5 overs. 1 maiden. 10 runs. NO wickets. Brilliant stuff. Spectators (all CRC supporters, bar one) bored? Hardly. Bowlers not named Energizers are profligate. Runs leak in all directions and manners. Boundaries, wides, leg-yes, even a bye. Energizer's efforts poured down the drain at other end.

Drinks - 12 overs: 68 for 2. Openers gone. Siva and Ganesh at crease. Siva gone! Swept full toss from Johnnie Walker (formerly Lord Warnie) to diving U-Turn at deep square-leg. Raucous celebrations ensue. Wait! Square-leg umpire signals no-ball. Travesty. Ball definitely below waist, Siva agrees but respects umpires decision. Gut shot. Game goes on. NCC leaks runs. Bowling lacks purpose. Siva and Ganesh get valuable batting practice. Sixes and fours galore. Whole innings resembles highlight package. No bowler is able to maintain required length. Too full, too easy to smash. Siva and Ganesh each score 60-plus.

Siva finally goes, but bowling stays the same. Later batsmen continue plundering. 6 of 8 batsmen hit at least one 6 in their innings. Only highlights of NCC display - fielding related. Thin Man throws a dart from long off to run-out opener. Little Man takes stunning reflex catch at point. Jonty would have been proud. Nothing else worth writing about.

Final damage - 221 for 5 in 25 overs. 153 runs in last 13 overs.

As always, let's now take a break to appreciate some of the less known things about the world around us.

• There are 20,000 living organisms in a glass of water.

• The Pacific Ocean is larger than all the land mass of the Earth.

• The hardest substance in your body is the enamel in your teeth.

• Your brain feels no pain.

• House dust is 70% dead skin cells.

• Heinz Ketchup leaving the bottle travels at 25 miles per year.

• More people are killed annually by donkeys than die in air crashes.

Bob Loblaw and Hercules open the batting. Double pinch hitters? Terrible mix-up occurs - Hercules run-out by Bob. Bob does not compensate, goes soon for 7. But not before Chikna botches another chance at #3. Timid drive to over-pitched ball. Superb one-handed catch by bowler leaping over Bob, the non-striker. Great catch, nevertheless Chikna more at fault - too tentative with drive. When Bob leaves next, it is 3 down for next to nothing.

Steady heads needed. Sunny Delight and Energizer provide just that. Take time to settle down. Play out Kannan (5-0-19-2). Sunny and Energizer up the ante with splendid running between the wickets, including an all-run four. Sunny looks to push the run-rate along. Succeeds in pushing ball to waiting fielder's hands at mid-wicket. 23 runs in 29 balls, 1 four. Platform has been set for final assault.

Required run-rate climbs over 10 an over for last 14 overs. Thin Man and Energizer launch assault at daunting target. Boundaries begin to pepper scorebook. No side of the ground is spared. Square-cuts for six, pulls for four, drives for six, flicks for four. Both batsmen on a tear. Energizer hits two successive reverse sweeps for four. Second one reaches fence in one bounce. Scintillating stuff. Thin Man plays straight and clears fielder or finds gaps with elan.

CRC needs miracle. Or two. Strange thing to say considering their strong position during the NCC chase. CRC gets a miracle. An outstanding catch running in at full speed from long-on. Prize wicket - Energizer! 81 runs in just 55 balls, 7 fours, 2 sixes.

Kamikaze struggles to connect properly. Watches Thin Man depart. Caught behind off an attempted slash. 55 runs in just 28 balls, 6 fours, 2 sixes. Welcome news - back in form. Unwelcome news - required target still stiff.

Situation becoming dire. Kamikaze holes out. U-Turn goes in. Almost impossible task ahead - 33 runs in 2 overs. Need all dice to fall in place. They don't. U-Turn departs via a catch at long-on. Captain Ozone swings and misses. Bowler does not and stumps walk away. Little Boy does not get to bat...again. 209 for 9 in 25 overs, 13 runs short. Great chase, but not enough.

CRC have their revenge. But they cannot take away the trophy that came with the BOGO deal of the previous game. So there!

Flying high

For the science geeks: Ever wondered why some birds are able to fly at high altitudes and others aren't? Here's a peek into one probable adaptation.

For the bar-headed goose, migration is a high-altitude adventure. Spring and fall it flies between Central Asia and India, a route that takes it over the highest mountains in the world, the Himalayas. The bird has been known to reach altitudes of 30,000 feet.

(...)

Mr. Scott and his colleagues examined pectoral muscles from bar-headed geese and compared them with those from related species, like barnacle geese, that don’t fly at extreme altitudes.

They found little difference among the birds in the amount and types of muscle fibers. But the bar-headed geese had more capillaries around the individual muscle cells. And within cells, more of the mitochondria — which use oxygen to supply energy to the cell — were nearer the cell membrane.

Bird on a wire

Here we go again. An Indian teenager comes up big in the sports world, in spite of and not because of the system in place. The backstory is familiar: hours of hardship and personal financial inputs until it pays off, followed by fawning media coverage, the anointment as the Next Big Thing, and the placement of humungus expectations (a carelessly thrown in "hopes of a billion people" is bound to show up soon enough).

Here's hoping Saina Nehwal does not go the way of Sania Mirza. Here's Rohit Mahajan with a fairly balanced piece on the latest badminton threat from India.

Saina Nehwal plays badminton in a manner almost unprecedented in Indian sport—the muscularity of her game, the strength of her smashes and the quickness of her eye and feet are incongruous with the delicate, all-wrist, cerebral style preferred by top Indian shuttlers of the past. “I can outlast the Chinese, they get tired too,” she states impassively.

(...)

When she was small—and called Steffi, for her parents were fans of the German tennis star—Saina would travel 50 km a day on her father’s scooter, to training and school. She’d sometimes fall asleep on the way, so her mother started accompanying them to keep her from falling off. Now Saina drives to training in her new luxury car. She has a great fan following, especially on the internet.

Much has changed but, say those who have seen her progress closely, she has not. “I’ve been meeting and talking with her for eight-odd years, she’s the same girl. Her politeness and values come from her family,” says badminton writer Dev S. Sukumar. Saina doesn’t turn down interview requests; she calls back if she misses a call or gets a text. That would explain frequent bills of over Rs 40,000 while on foreign tours. Money, in fact, was a bit tight until the Mittal Trust of Champions got interested in her.

Jaundiced eye

Here's how you go about making a fool of yourself and bring into question your journalistic nous.

Case Study: Malcolm Conn of The Australian

Thesis: Poor umpiring is costing the Aussies dearly in the Ashes.

Proof: Rudi Koertzen's inconsistent interpretation of LBW's.

Koertzen's umpiring is not the reason why Australia is 0-1 down in the series.
(...)
But his decisions have been embarrassing. Three of Australia's first four wickets in the second innings at Lord's fell to bad umpiring decisions.

And Koertzen made sure that Johnson's difficult Ashes series would not get any better.

He gave Johnson out leg before wicket to a ball going over the stumps and refused to give Ian Bell out leg before wicket to a delivery which could not have been more out. Just add them to the list of howlers.

Conclusion: The Indian cricket Board (BCCI) is to blame for it because it is the richest Board in the world.

And perhaps just a fraction of the billions India makes from television rights and the player-destroying Indian Premier League could be spent on developing a few decent umpires of its own.

Until then umpires like Rudi Koertzen, once probably the best in the world, will continue on the circuit, and cricket will be poorer for it.

I am not the biggest fan of the BCCI and its shenanigans, but this is a bit too much even for me.

Flogging a horse because it isn't raining in the desert makes more practical sense than this diatribe.

Dil se...

In today's soundbite world, where the media is waiting for any excuse to go off on a triple exclamation binge, it is unusual for athletes to be honest and forthcoming in their responses. Case in point, Tiger Woods and Sachin Tendulkar, who are among the most boring to hear/read for the sterile answers they provide.

So, it comes as a breath of fresh air when someone takes the time to give well-thought out, honest, and elaborate responses. Leander Paes spoke at length about various topics to DNA. While I have never hidden my admiration for the guy, it still bears saying that this is how you give an interview! Some snippets are provided below, but do read the whole thing.

Is surface the reason why Nadal managed to win the Wimbledon?
Yes. It's the reason why Lleyton Hewitt has won the Wimbledon, in my opinion. That's the reason Nadal beat Federer, even got close. It's the reason why the serve-and-volleyers are becoming extinct. Roger is invincible on fast grass.

How rampant is match fixing in tennis?
I am sure gambling is there in everything in life. I haven't seen match fixing with my own eyes in tennis so it's not right for me to comment. The only thing is that you cannot convict any player without evidence.

What happened with Gaurav Natekar?
I have heard that some of my fellow Indian players were offered money. Gaurav Natekar apparently said he was offered money at the Hiroshima Asian Games (1994). I won the gold medal there at doubles with Gaurav. I am very happy that he didn't accept the offer. If he had done that, I would have known that on court. If any of my partners accept money, I would never ever speak to him, leave alone playing with him again.

Do you see yourself going into an administrative role?
If there is an admin role that allows me to be hands on with the children on the field and nurture them and help them prosper, I'd love to. But if it's about occupying a chair and having my name and design printed on a card... mere bas ka kaam nahi hai...

Link courtesy BF/DSC.

Speechless

I am speechless. Watch these videos and you will see why. I cannot even fathom how the idea that art could be created in these formats came to mind.



Here's the second one: Try to imagine what the end result will be like before you start watching the video and then see if it matches it.



(Directed to these videos via Prem Panicker's blog)

TMC: Episode 8 - Déjà vu all over again

Welcome to The Midwest Chronicles (TMC). These are the accounts of the exploits of the Nebraska Cricket Club in the 2009 season. To spice up what would otherwise be a routine match report of runs scored, wickets taken, and catches snaffled (or spilled) these posts are being written with a tongue firmly in cheek but with the facts completely in the true. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the meandering show.

Here's a complete guide to the cast of characters and their nicknames. The cast will be updated as players are added or dropped or nicknames changed as the season progresses.

Those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it.
- George Santayana

Every great mistake has a halfway moment, a split second when it can be recalled and perhaps remedied.
- Pearl S. Buck

The top of the CLIA league table is beginning to tighten up and with the money end of the season coming up, each game assumes greater importance. The Iowa State University team wandered into Omaha hoping to leap-frog into the 4th spot in the race for the semi-finals. The stage was set for a hard-fought battle. Last year the games between NCC and ISU were very close (more on that later) and this game was no different.

Captain Ozone entrusted Bob Loblaw with the toss. Naturally, the portly one lost the toss and had the duty of informing his team that they would be batting first. Thin Man and U-Turn began sedately as Usman and Anwar pegged away at a just short of good length line. U-Turn, mindful of recent low scores, looked to middle everything and spend some time out there. Unfortunately, the first overpitched ball of the innings was too juicy to avoid and his attempt to clear mid-off failed. The batting hero of the previous match, Sunny Delight (yay...I have a nickname for him now), proceeded to play his way in while trying to guide Thin Man. Thin Man, having changed bats before the match began, was having a tough time connecting with the ball. He still managed to hit what was to be the biggest six of the day, but eventually his frustration at not striking cleanly got to him and he was out for a paltry 8 in 11 balls.

Abraiz, ISU's big (6'5") man, was brought into the attack to stir things up and he did just that, getting Chikna Slater bowled while attempting to biff a shorter length ball into the tenanted leg-side where deep square-leg and deep midwicket were waiting patiently. Just 6 runs in 18 balls was a sad return for his cautious vigil.

In the past few matches Energizer Bunny has been having a good time in the middle and the law of averages was bound to catch up with him, and it did. After being tied down for a couple of overs by Abriaz, Energizer looked to take matters into his own hands and stepped down the wicket to loft him to the long-off fence. With the ball speeding away past him, the mid-off fielder took off and took an acrobatic catch to save a sure-fire boundary, among other things. A labored innings of 4 runs in 14 balls was brought to a spectacular close.

Almost immediately afterwards, Sunny D looked to clip the spinner (Sharan) for an easy single to long-on. Instead the bat turned in his hand and a laddoo of a catch was taken at short-midwicket. His innings of 18 runs in 21 balls promised a lot more than it eventually delivered.

Ozone pushed and prodded his way, poaching singles in his typical nurdling style, while Doctor Kamikaze began his innings with a typical bang, slamming a four to deep midwicket off the first ball he faced. These two normally do not get to bat together in matches (usually because Kamikaze cannot be bothered to hang around at the crease till Ozone shows up) and, not surprisingly, a misunderstanding between them led to Ozone's needless runout. (Having said that, here's something to think about, when is a runout NOT needless?).

The score read 86 for 5 in the 17th over. With 13+ overs still to go, Bob Loblaw walked in to thundering silence. Over the next hour and a half Bob resisted all urges to throw his wicket way, constantly reminding himself to stay put till the end. With Bob in a combative mood, Kamikaze began to unfurl his drinking-cat hoiks (eyes closed, swing bat), connecting enough times to keep frustrating the bowler and the opposition fielders. Twice Kamikaze's swings connected well-enough to scatter the grasshoppers near the far road, but apart from those sixes it was hard work for the fellow. Taking on one too many risks, Kamikaze lost his stumps to Abraiz but not before compiling 43 runs in 49 balls with 2 sixes. His 50 run partnership with Bob had advanced the team score into the 130's and what was needed was a final flourish.

King Warnie and Bob kept the ball along the ground and ran two's and three's as often as possible. Bob pulled up with a sore back and U-Turn came back to run for him. At the end of 29 overs the score was 147, and Bob turned on the gas and 16 runs came from the final over. 163 for 7 in 30 overs was a competitive score. Warnie, playing with a great sense of purpose and along straight lines, scored 13 in 9 balls. Bob remained not out on 39 runs in 36 balls, with three boundaries. In the 7 matches he has played this season, this was the fifth time (out of the 6 times he has batted) he has been there at the end of the innings (including three not outs), often taking the team past a tender stage into a position from which a victory is possible.

We shall now take our regularly scheduled mid-inning meaningless trivia break.

• The most commonly-spoken languages in the world are: Mandarin (907 Million); English (456); Hindi (383); Spanish (362).

• The most common street name in US: Park Street.

• The Statue of Liberty is not in New York state, but in New Jersey.

• Pencils are hexagonal because they're cheaper. You can make 9 hexagon pencils with the same wood it takes to make 8 round.

• The only country with 100 percent literacy rate: Iceland (They also have to speak 3 languages).

• Proportional to their weight, men are stronger than horses.

There are two ways of chasing a middling target (164 to win in 30 overs at less than 6 an over) a) attack in the first few overs and bring the asking rate down so drastically that no more risks are required the rest of the way b) Reduce all risks and take it slowly and ease your way to victory ISU came out with plan A in mind. The first over of the innings by Energizer featured three cross-batted pulls to the fence and ISU were up and running. King Warnie had difficulty controlling his flight and gifted runs in wides and boundaries, not discriminating between the two. The 5th over of the innings was a complete surprise - a maiden by Enegizer. Yet after 6 overs the score was 61 for no loss. 103 runs to get in 24 overs with all 10 wickets in hand. Serious advantage: ISU. Ankur was the opener who was on the move and getting him out was paramount if NCC wanted any chance at all to get some positives from the match. While he had bludgeoned his way to a rapidfire 50 (off just 34 balls), Ankur was not content and that led to his downfall. A short ball by Warnie was hit towards deep midwicket, where U-Turn came racing in and dove full-length forward to take a brilliant catch just inches off the ground. By then Ankur had already made 55 runs in 41 balls, with 9 fours. This was easily the best catch of the season for NCC and was reminiscent of a similar effort by an Aussie a few years ago (see the first catch in this video).

Three balls later another rubbish ball got Warnie a wicket. Usman did not quite know what to do with a low full-toss and tamely patted it back to the bowler. And just like that a breach had been made and NCC came roaring in.

Ozone turned to his middle over enforcer and U-Turn did not let him down. Bowling his deadly wicket-to-wicket wobbly swingers, U-Turn cast a spell and the scoring reduced to a trickle. At the other end, Fifth Element was brought on to keep up the pressure and between the two of them the bowlers did just that. Bowling in tandem as if they had been at it for years, the duo slowed the rate to such an extent that something had to give. Not surprisingly it was the batsman. Another cross-batted hoick found its way into a diving U-Turn's hand at deep midwicket and Fifth was back in the wickets. Pretty soon, Fifth surprised everyone, including himself, by latching on to a sharp return chance offered by Prasanna. 61 for no loss in 6 overs had disintegrated into 98 for 5. But the fast start had ensured that the required run-rate was always of manageable proportions. What was needed was a calm head to take the team through and Lakshmi Narayan (LN) set about to do just that for ISU.

Refusing to take any risks, LN was content to take the very occasional single and the more-than-occasional wide that was on offer and the match slowly meandered for a while. However, one rush of blood from Anwar was enough to see him lose his stumps to U-Turn and increase the pressure on LN. 113 for 6.

U-Turn and Fifth completed their spells in one go and throttled the ISU momentum brilliantly. U-Turn finished with analyses of 6-1-13-2, while Fifth provided great support with 6-0-27-2.

Chikna breathed fire looking for the breakthroughs the team needed and settled down from one end while Ozone circulated between his options at the other end. Sharan and LN kept things very quiet and it would take a burst of inspiration to change up things and Chikna managed that with a picture perfect in-cutter that took out Sharan's off-stump. 138 for 7.

Kamikaze came in at the other end to bowl in the death and, like every other every bowler, was having trouble breaching LN's defences. Slowly but surely LN inched the score along but his long vigil came to an end when he missed a flick off of a straight ball from Kamikaze and was trapped dead plumb in front of the stumps. LN's innings of 17 runs in 53 balls was one of those double-edged swords in that it gave both teams a glimmer of victory. 152 for 8.

Abraiz came in shaking his head at the situation of the innings and pummeled the first ball he faced to the long-off fence with chilling nonchalance. At the other end 18-year old Daya played with immense purpose and actually scored most of the runs, swinging cross-batted at everything and managing to get enough bat to not get out. In the 29th over, with just 9 runs needed for a win, one such shot took the outside edge and sped away to the third man fence.

With 6 balls to go, Abraiz was on strike. Three runs to win, two wickets in hand and Kamikaze with the ball in hand. The first ball was slightly wide of the off-stump and a wild swing by Abraiz yielded a thick edge to third man and the batsmen quickly ran two runs to level the scores. 5 balls to go, 2 wickets in hand, 1 run to win, Abraiz on strike...massive advantage: ISU.

The second ball of the over was punched o short cover where Warnie quickly converged on the ball. Seeing this Abraiz refused the run but the non-striker had taken too big a lead and could not recover in time. A calm throw by Warnie to Kamikaze produced the runout.

4 balls to go, 1 wicket in hand, 1 run to win, Abraiz on strike...advantage: ISU, but the margin of error had decreased considerably.

Let's step away from the action for a flashback: Last year, ISU hosted NCC in a 25 over game. In that game, with about 8 overs to go, and 7 wickets down, Bob Loblaw had taken the score to 143 while scoring 20-odd not out. Then in the final over bowled by Kamikaze, with one ball to go and one wicket in hand, ISU needed 3 runs to win. The batsman was, you guessed it, Abraiz. He lofted a ball to deep midwicket where the fielder dropped the catch (!) but then showed good presence of mind to throw to the non-strikers end where Abraiz was runout going for the winning third run, thereby tying the game.

So, coming back to the present - here's a refresher of where we left things: 4 balls to go, 1 wicket in hand, 1 run to win, Abraiz on strike...advantage: ISU, but the margin of error had decreased considerably.

The next ball by Kamikaze was on good length targeting the off-stump. Abraiz's eyes lit up and he went for a cross-batted flick that missed everything. Unluckily for him, Kamikaze did not miss the stumps and for the second time in two years ISU and NCC had tied the game!!

Each team went back with 4 points for the tie and a feeling of what-if. What-if NCC had not bowled 32 wides? What-if Abraiz had not lost his cool? What-if...?

In the end, what we got was a memorable match that will be hard to forget.